Key Points in this Episode:✔️ Eric posits that early on, it is necessary to get a therapist or a divorced coach, “we are not as qualified as a therapist who can get to know you in an entirely different manner and be with you when the case is over.” Lawyers most often can focus on the legal side and are not fully qualified to assist you in dealing with the emotional and psychological aspects. ✔️ Be careful who you listen to. Friends and people close to you should be supportive and encouraging during the process. However, should your friends tell you about their case, or the people they know may confuse you. Remember, every case is different, and you must focus more on yours and talk to the professionals. ✔️ Remember that while a divorce is personal, it is also a business transaction. Eric shares that clients who had their cases move the fastest are the ones that decide rationally and treat it like a business transaction. “In 80 -90% of our cases, people figure out what to do with their kids and don’t have many issues.” ✔️You may need a real estate appraiser to come in. Many states don’t recognize what a real estate broker values a house; if you cannot agree on the value of a house with your spouse, you may need a certified real estate appraiser. ✔️ Seek the guidance of parenting coordinators. They can be your fallback and prevent everyone from going to court and resolving new issues. It’s much more expensive to go to court and pay your lawyers than it is to see an excellent therapist or social worker. ✔️ Other experts you may have to bring in are a business evaluator, a forensic accountant, a financial planner, and trust and estate lawyer in the three stages of the divorce process. They will help you make sound decisions and save you from spending higher costs in the future.
Connect with Eric Broder
Eric Broder is a co-founding member and partner at Broder Orland Murray & DeMattie LLC.
He is an AV Preeminent rated attorney by Martindale Hubbell®, the highest possible rating in both legal ability and ethical standards, earned through a strenuous peer and judicial review procedure.
He has also been designated a “Top Lawyer” in Family Law, Matrimonial, Arbitration, and Mediation in Westport, Greenwich, New Canaan/Darien, and Fairfield Magazines.
Eric has been selected as a Connecticut Super Lawyers® in Family Law each year from 2013 to 2020. Each year no more than 5% of the lawyers in the state are selected to receive this honor.
Connect with Wendy Sterling
Need an opportunity to share your pain points and receive judgment-free support? Want to create a vision of a future after your divorce? Click here to schedule your Free Divorce Recovery Call: https://calendly.com/wendysterling/15-minute-divorce-recovery-call
Going through an immense betrayal can be the most difficult thing to get over. In fact, it makes it hard for us to trust others again. Believe me. I know how it feels. My ex-husband cheated on me, and he was the last person I’d have ever thought to be capable of hurting me. It took me some time to realize that trust has to start within ourselves.
After her son was born, Kristy Carruthers had to sell off their clothing, jewelry, and belongings. She started interviewing for jobs at four weeks postpartum. After living on credit cards for a few months, she just hit the end of the rope and ended up having to sell the house to pay the credit card bills. That’s when the mind shift happened. I said to myself, ‘You know what? This can never happen again. This is not acceptable.'”
When I was married, divorce was never on my mind.
It never occurred to me that it had to be something I should learn about.
Fast forward to today, it continues to be that gift that keeps on giving. It has taught me about myself more than I ever knew.
Even though I’ve undergone therapy, I still believe that what I’ve endured and experienced post-divorce unraveled five lessons that I never would’ve discovered on my own.