We were the perfect family that we were portraying to be on social media. Suddenly, it was that moment where I was lost and confused, asking what I was supposed to do when my marriage had to end. I’ve been with this man since I was 18 and I don’t know life without him.
While I was terrified and stayed in that mindset for probably longer than I wanted to, it wasn’t until I discovered the world of coaching where I could start envisioning and stepping into the life that I wanted to create. I began to see my blank slate as an opportunity— to figure out who I am instead of thinking who I am through the lens of somebody else. It allowed me to step into my power of deciding to leave corporate America, something that I had wanted to do for so many years but needed somebody’s blessing to be able to do so.
All this time, my divorce was that kick in the butt that I needed to wake up and start becoming the woman I wanted to be instead of being who everybody else thought I should be.
Top points you’ll discover:
✔️ Divorced at the age of 40: you can choose to look at it as a tragedy or an opportunity. Indeed it can be scary, but it can also be amazing that you get a redo of your life. When in discomfort, it means that growth is on the other side. Have an open mind about what is possible for you.
✔️ Wake up and become the woman you want. As I look back: I was on autopilot, miserable, and sacrificed myself. I was a horrible communicator who wasn’t ever really able to verbalize how I felt and what it was that I genuinely wanted. With my divorce, misfortune became my breakthrough.
✔️ Remember, age is just a number. If you allow it to dictate what you can and can’t do and associate it with being “too late”, then guess what? You’re going to create that for yourself.
✔️ Embrace the blank slate and pick the colors that you want your life’s picture to be. It’s time to stop asking permission and define for yourself what it means to be happy, carefree, and peaceful. Breed love into your home, and people will see what happiness indeed looks like on your face.
✔️ Life after marriage is something that you decide to create for yourself. If you have to get rid of your home, perhaps you have to move into a new place; it can be scary. But remember, you are home for yourself and your kids; it’s not the space itself.
Connect with Wendy Sterling:
Need an opportunity to share your pain points and receive judgment-free support? Want to create a vision of a future after your divorce? Click here to schedule your Free Divorce Recovery Call: https://calendly.com/wendysterling/support-call-with-wendy?month=2021-07
Going through an immense betrayal can be the most difficult thing to get over. In fact, it makes it hard for us to trust others again. Believe me. I know how it feels. My ex-husband cheated on me, and he was the last person I’d have ever thought to be capable of hurting me. It took me some time to realize that trust has to start within ourselves.
After her son was born, Kristy Carruthers had to sell off their clothing, jewelry, and belongings. She started interviewing for jobs at four weeks postpartum. After living on credit cards for a few months, she just hit the end of the rope and ended up having to sell the house to pay the credit card bills. That’s when the mind shift happened. I said to myself, ‘You know what? This can never happen again. This is not acceptable.'”
When I was married, divorce was never on my mind.
It never occurred to me that it had to be something I should learn about.
Fast forward to today, it continues to be that gift that keeps on giving. It has taught me about myself more than I ever knew.
Even though I’ve undergone therapy, I still believe that what I’ve endured and experienced post-divorce unraveled five lessons that I never would’ve discovered on my own.